Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Looking forward

A few years ago, I remember coming home after work. It had been one of those long days, after I had probably been working on some brief or another. I found myself alone in the car, driving home when there were very few cars on the road. All dark around me, a random street light here and there.

It was no different than many other nights I had worked late. When I had come home, only to roll into bed and to roll out as early as I needed to the next morning. But on this night, maybe it was the fatigue. Or being worn down after having worked in the office all day and late into the night, sitting in front of the computer all by myself. Or being wrapped in the night's darkness.

Whatever it was, I remember thinking that all I had was my job and my house. That those were it. And the thought depressed the hell out of me.

Tonight, sitting here, the night before I am to be induced to deliver our baby, I am reminded how long it has been since I've had a thought like that. All has been so good in my world for so long now. Even with all the nonsense that occurred with my job last year -- and the miscarriages. Through all that, I never felt despondent in the way I felt that night.

As I sit here, all feels so right with my world. And I know it'll only be righter tomorrow.

19 comments:

  1. So exciting, I bet you can't wait to meet the little one!

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  2. I'm so happy you don't feel that way anymore. I am so glad for your tomorrow, both literally and figuratively, and your today.

    The first is a good day for a baby to start his life in this world. :)

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  3. Sending peaceful, healthy thoughts your way today Shinyung. Best of everything.

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  4. Shinyung--
    After today, you'll never be alone again. Sometimes it's maddening, but then you look at your child in wonder and realize that it is so hard to remember life before they were here.

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  5. Best of luck on everything, Shinyung! Sending lots of love your way!

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  6. Shinyung, wishing you all the best as you greet your little one!

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  7. All the best to you and your family!

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  8. Well, good for you and congratulations. How apropos a reflection on the eve of your first baby - I well remember the night before my first child was 'induced' to arrive, and the miscarriages that preceded the birth of my twins two years later. They all three now are the light of my life but I'm not sure how much light i put in theirs. I hope you can spend a good amount of quality time with your child...as a slave of Biglaw for 25 years, with three kids and no support from their dad (gone when twins were infants), I really missed a lot....and the precious 12 weeks home with them when they were tiny babies is such a warm memory. Enjoy every minute. Best of luck and warm wishes to you and baby!

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  9. Compared to your own little one, a job really doesn't mean much. I was another slave to biglaw for many years but once my little angel was born I left and I have never been happier. I still have a hard time believing how much happier we are. Enjoy your baby!

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  10. congratulations on everything.
    -a female law student, who has followed your story and admires your strength.

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  11. Congratulations and best of luck to you!

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  12. Hoping everything went well and you are both safe and sound. Natasha Ell, Steve, Max and Kate xxxx

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  13. congratulations. i wish you and your new baby the very best

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  14. Wow!! Congrats, I am so very thrilled for you. You deserve, and indeed seem to be getting, all the best!

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  15. Been there, done all that! And I'm here to tell you that you will never look at life the same after that little bundle of joy arrives. Even when the crap rains down, your child's innocent little outlook will make you smile and fill you with joy. Ask me if my opinion has changed when we hit the teenage years, but so far I just see it all getting more and more fun. Enjoy!

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  16. Congratulations! I really admire you and the way you handled your nasty firm, and I am so happy for you and your family! I wish you all the very best.

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  17. Congrats on the new addition to your family. You deserve all the happiness in the world!r

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  18. All the best to you, and please post an update so that we can all toast with a glass of champagne for you!

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  19. Congratulations! I am cheering for you today as you welcome your little one.

    Neeter

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